Are Your Excuses Greater Than Your Dreams?

Last week, I was talking to an elderly lady who plays keyboard and writes songs. She told me that recently a young woman had heard her songs and her playing and was so impressed that she asked the old lady to teach her to play keyboard.

Then the old lady said to me that she agreed to take on the young woman as a student but that she'd never become a good pianist because she's left-handed.

What she meant by that was that piano or keyboard playing is usually more technically demanding of the right hand than the left hand. Most of the work is happening in the right hand. So in the old lady's mind, because this young woman is left-handed, she was at a significant disadvantage that she wouldn't be able to overcome - because technical proficiency or dexterity was only possible in your dominant hand.

Now, at this point I interjected. I told her that I'm left-handed but that I didn't let that dictate what I was capable of as a piano player. Yes, initially I had to do more work on my right hand to get it up to the same level as my left hand. But with time, effort, and persistence, my right hand actually surpassed my left hand's ability. I could play just as well as, and even better than a lot of right-handed players. And that's not a brag. The old lady had heard me play and said I play beautifully.

She looked shocked when I told her that I was left-handed. You could see the cognitive dissonance she was experiencing. She believed that it was only possible to achieve technical proficiency in your dominant hand. And she was trying to reconcile that with the reality that I had achieved technical proficiency in my non-dominant hand on the piano to the point where it had actually become better than my dominant hand. I had totally shattered that belief and proved it was nothing but a myth.

Eventually, I think she left with a more open mind about what was possible for her student, and her being left-handed didn't have to be a ceiling on her development as a keyboard player.

I tell you this story because it's a perfect example of a phenomenon Bob Proctor talks about.

He says we've been conditioned to accept many limitations.

We have accepted these limitations as the parameters of what's possible for our lives.

We say “I can't do this because I'm...yada, yada, yada.”

For you, it may not be “I'll never be a great piano player because I'm left-handed.”

Maybe you're dyslexic and you were told that you'd never be able to read well or learn much.

Maybe you've suffered a physical injury and were told that you'll never be able to walk again.

Or maybe you've got a speech impediment and were told you'd never be a great speaker or communicator.

Or it might be something far more benign or subtle. “I have kids, so I don't have time.”

If someone tells you you can't do something, they're showing you their limits, not yours.

If you really want to do something, you'll find a way. If you don't, you'll find an excuse.

Tony Robbins says there are only two options: Make progress or make excuses.

So I want to ask you: Are your excuses greater than your dreams?

If they are, then you've probably been conditioned to accept some limitation, and you've allowed that to shortchange what's possible for your life.

Even worse than when someone else tells us that we can't do something is when we tell ourselves we can't do something. This probably happens more often than other people telling us our limitations.

I've noticed a lot of musicians and artists use their creativity as an excuse or as a limitation.

“I can't do marketing and business – I'm a musician.”

“I can't have structure in my life and be organised and consistent – I'm creative.”

“I can't schedule my writing when I'm not inspired – I'm an artist.”

“I can't understand anything to do with numbers or data – I'm right-brained.”

“I can't release my music yet – I'm a perfectionist.”

“I can't read sheet music – I'm an ear player.”

“I can't do a Facebook Live video – I need the energy of a crowd to feed off.”

“I can't be wealthy or financially secure – I'm a starving musician.”

Do any of these resonate with you? Have you ever said or thought any of these?

These are not actual limitations. They're just limiting beliefs.

Bob Proctor also said that when you get the feeling you can't do something, that's a reflection of your conditioning, not a reflection of your potential.

If you fight for your limitations, you get to keep them.

Our biggest limitation is actually our mindset.

90% of the game is played above the shoulders.

There is always a way if you're committed. I proved that with my piano playing. I wanted to be a great piano player so much that I wasn't going to let my being left-handed be an obstacle to my dream.

What's your version of “I'll never be a great piano player because I'm left-handed.” What's a limitation that you've been conditioned to accept, either by others or yourself?

I'd like to invite you to make the decision, right now, to stop fighting for your limitation, whatever it might be. To not allow that limitation to be the ceiling on your potential; to define the parameters of what's possible for your life. Refuse to allow your excuses to be greater than your dream.